


fighting for her right to (leap, love, laugh)

by hydrangea



Category: Den lille Havfrue | The Little Mermaid - Hans Christian Andersen
Genre: F/M, and the prince isn't that stupid either, the little mermaid was a strong person
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-13
Updated: 2018-05-13
Packaged: 2019-05-06 05:04:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,708
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14634684
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hydrangea/pseuds/hydrangea
Summary: The Little Mermaid knew what she wanted. It wasn't easy and she might've paid a dearer price than she had anticipated. She did know, however, that her future was what she made for herself.





	fighting for her right to (leap, love, laugh)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [roguefaerie (samidha)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/samidha/gifts).



> I knew what I wanted to write when I saw this prompt. I grew up with the Andersen version of the story and I had always been fascinated by the fact that this girl didn't let knives under her feet or the lack of a tongue stop her. She was one determined girl that knew exactly what she wanted.
> 
> My portrayals of her chronic pain and lack of tongue are based on my own experiences (pain) and research (tongue) but doesn't, of course, mean that this is how these conditions work for everyone.

The moment after everything changed, she opened her eyes. The sky above her looked the same. The thick foliage floating up and out like kelp over the river from which she had surfaced looked the same as they had before. Her arm, reaching for the sun, looked the same; the fingers spread to shelter her eyes from the light were her own.  
  
She took a deep breath, and then, with an exhalation, she let her awareness of her body continue lower. Her chest and her stomach, her lower gills--but no, humans had no gills. They had hips and joints that parted and became...  
  
She shied away from the thought, choosing instead to flex new muscles - and find which ones she no longer had. Only when the memories of lateral tail muscles had faded and she had found the ones humans had in the lower body instead of them, did she continue further.  
  
Drawing on memories from her studies in human lore, she found the human reproductive system, thighs, knees, calves and feet with toes at the end. Part by part, she tried the muscles out until she finally wiggled the toes.  
  
Breathless with giggles, she enjoyed the shiver that ran through her new body. Then she stretched, searched for the water she knew had to be just beyond the toes - where her tail fin had rested beneath the surface with seagrass stroking the skin. They brushed the surface - and the water felt the same! She stuck them further in, then jerked them up to splash water all over herself like a youngling at their first visit to the underwater caves.  
  
She took another breath. Lifted the feet towards the skies and wiggled the toes.

Her toes.  
  
" _Human_ ," she tried to say.  
  
Her _voice_.  
  
  
  
Humans, she had found, were very sensitive to temperature changes. Watching them from underwater, she had thought clothing was decorative. They had, to her, seemed like the netting of kelp she sometimes wove around her body to fasten pretty trinkets to. Living above, it seemed instead as if every cold evening or sunny morning required a change in clothing to maintain a temperature that humans could withstand. That sensitivity appeared not to be part of what the sea witch had given her however - and when she thought back to their conversation she could remember no promise of changes beyond giving her legs.  
  
She rather wished she had paid attention to the conversation.  
  
"Are you cold, my lady?"

And there it was - the question that she had been asked more than any other. She would've thought they'd ask of her origins or the bright white of her legs compared to the skin of her arms - but no, their concern was for whatever temperature her body ought to prefer.  
  
She smiled at the young boy that had been assigned to take care of her comfort. They had taken him from the King's personal entourage. This, apparently, involved knowing how to communicate with the tongueless and voiceless. She did not fully understand this, but he had taught her a rudimentary sign language and guided her first attempts  to eat as a human did. It seemed strange that enough people had lost their tongues and voices that they had knowledge of how to circumvent it, but rudimentary sign language was far from enough to ask questions of that nature.  
  
The sign for 'no' was, however, close to the sign used by fish herders to corrall their pods. The sign she followed up with appeared to her a mix between easing hand muscles and her grandmother gesturing in disgust over the amount of limpets on someones tail. She was not sure how it translated to 'I want to eat' but the boy understood.

Most important of all, however, he left the room.  
  
She exhaled. One small room. One balcony. This was the world in which they kept her.  
  
It was not how she had imagined life as a human with her prince.  
  
She ought to have known. Had she not been a princess? There was little more strict than life in a palace - and what was more strict, was life in a palace when you were suffering from an unknown illness. Had not her grandmother kept her cooped up when her melancholy grew strong?  
  
When the Prince had carried her from the river and to his carriage, she had thought that the loss of her voice would keep them apart. Instead, he had taken this in his stride, procuring teachers and caretakers to teach her how to cope, and instead become concerned with her feet.  
  
Of course, concern or not, she would not stay cooped up in bed because they could find no reason for her feet to bleed as they did. She knew, which was enough until she could tell them.  
  
She threw a wary look at the door - it would not be long until the boy returned. If she reached the padded bench on the balcony before he did, he would not take her back to bed. She kicked off the sumptious blankets on her bed and slid to the edge.  
  
Toes, foot, calf. She took a deep breath. Then, she put weight on her legs and feet and stood.  
  
For a moment, it felt as if she had become entangled in the threads of one of the sting dancers in shallow waters. Then she focused, hard, and ran to the balcony.  
  
Blades slashed into her feet, needles pierced her skin. Her soles slid on the blood beneath them, her knees threatened to give out.  
  
She inhaled, gripped the sides of the archway leading outside. The deep scent of roses. The smell of pine trees baked in the sun. Water splashing into water and the sound of small fishes chatting and avoiding the guardian fish of the pond. The breeze carrying salt from the spray far beneath.  
  
There was no pain during those last few steps, only her pounding heart and the smile spreading through her body.  
  
_Home_.  
  
  
  
Clean linen wraps for her feet and ankles. Silk stockings and lambskin slippers. Silk gown and a heavy embroidered overcoat. Combs for her hair and pearls looped around her neck.  Carved walking sticks and an entourage at her heels ready to help her into a sedan at first hint of fatigue.  
  
It was silly.  
  
"It would make me feel better," Prince Kai told her.  
  
Well, it had better, she had thought. She had given her feet. She had given her tongue and voice. All for the beauty of above-seas, the knowledge existing beyond the reaches of the ocean, and the lively passion of this young man.  
  
"You have chosen a name for yourself?" he had asked her even earlier than that.  
  
She had spelled it out for him, never looking away from his eyes. It was the name she had found studying the few tomes written in the old sea language, the name that marked her as part of _this_.  
  
" _Terra_." There was a flash of satisfaction in his eyes. "You have chosen well."  
  
She had put her hands on his shoulders then, kept him in place as she stood. His eyes widened, his arms flew towards her. She stepped away, let her arms drop. Walked across the room to the balcony and sat on the bench without as much as a twitch. Bloody footsteps trailed behind her.  
  
She willed him to see it, to see her strength.  
  
He had followed her, as she knew that he would. He had stopped in the archway, however, looking at his own feet. They were stained with blood. "Nothing can hold you back, can it?" he said, kneeling to touch the smeared blood.  
  
Burying the urge to try to talk - something she had grown increasingly adept at - she caught his eyes instead and shook her head. She held out her hand, inviting him to join her.  
  
He took it and let her pull him over. Together, they watched the panorama spread out beneath them. She could feel the intial tension in his shoulders, but then it dissipated - as if he had come to a decision.  
  
"Would you like to come with me to the city tomorrow?"  
  
She had squeezed his hand and entangled their fingers, enjoying the broad smile on his face and the gentleness with which he brushed a stray strand of hair from her face.  
  
Which landed her where she was. And, truly, if this was the first step to let her explore the world, she did not mind in the least to let him care for her.

 

There were days when she was tired. When her feet never touched the ground and she refused to eat or attempt to sign. When she turned away from the balconies and asked instead to be carried to the sea baths, where she could float and feel the familiar salt on skin and the carresses the kelp reaching for her.

Those were the days when the Prince Kai came to the waters with her. When he carried her to and fro in his own arms and tempted her with dishes made from shellfish and seagrass, from the great fishes that could only live upright and the small creatures that got trapped in tidal pools. He would float with her and let the sea creatures come and go as they would not be let to do at other times.

She would wonder if he knew. Whether there was a reason there were a handful of tomes in the sea languages. If there was a reason they had never remarked on the differences between her and those born on land.

Those days, however, were also the days when she didn't care. When she refused to be strong.

That was fine, however, because he was strong for her.

He came to the sea for her as she came to the land for him.

 

(Perhaps, one day, he came to her and said: "I have found a witch that will let you return to the seas, should you wish."

She might then sign: "I love the seas, but the land is my home."

"Even though the price you pay is high?"

"I chose to pay the price, and, for me, the price was not high at all.")


End file.
